i go from being fully sad and almost in tears to wanting to kill people. i'm so sick of it. why can't i feel normal? why can't i just have the usual problems of people my age? why was i chosen to be tourced in life instead of some other person? why is it that my problems have hardly anything to do with guys and school work like everyone else but have more to do with the fact that i want to kill myself? why is it that i feel the need to cover the scars on my arm ? why is that i can't trust anyone in mylife fully. i cant even trust my best friends. i can't tell a girl i've known most of my life anything anymore. i don't even want to see her in case she sees all the scars. i'm so afraid of life and people that i can't say what i really want to. i wish no one knew, i wish i didn't have to explain anything. i wish i didn't exist